Moaning Musical Mothers

My teenage daughter told me off today. OK, so it's nothing new (I'm a lousy mother), but I do feel that she was out of order on this occasion. It's not as if I was doing anything wrong, I was only SINGING. I suppose the fact that I was wearing headphones (I'd been told to do that because I was disturbing her tv viewing) meant I was singing rather loudly (like you do when you're wearing headphones), but it's not as if I can't sing (well OK, I've had better singing days, but I'm still in tune). The thing is, since I've discovered Last.fm, I've been able to listen to all sorts of stuff I haven't heard in years, plus lots of new stuff, and I just have to sing to it if I'm in a singing mood. And today I just happened to be in a singing mood.

Anyway, I had a sort of indie morning, then I switched to the old sixties flower power stuff, which I just can't resist warbling to. It takes me back to when I was young and free and hopeful and totally unaware of the existence of "good old days". Anyway, there I was, warbling away at the top of my voice to Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds and I got told off. I am now about to start warbling at the top of my voice to Itchycoo Park (for the second time) and no doubt I will get told off again, because I also sing this one very loudly (well, you have to, haven't you. Poor Stevie's been dead for almost 16 years, he wouldn't hear me if I didn't ... my god, has it been that long?). Anyway, let's face it, lyrics these days just can't compare to blowing your mind by getting hung-up feeding ducks with a bun.

My eldest son was here this morning and he sort of told me off as well, although not for singing. He said it didn't seem at all right that his mother should enjoy the same sort of bands he did and as a result he was seriously considering changing his musical tastes totally. I reminded him that he was the one who was heavily into the Doors, which were actually from my era not his, but he excused that by pointing out that the Doors were timeless and therefore didn't count.

One thing I've noticed is that some people on Last.fm have no idea how to tag music. As an example, I am more than happy to listen to Ace of Base because I like them (I am warbling away to them now as it happens), but they are NOT from the flower-power era, not unless it lasted into the 90's, which it didn't. And has anyone else noticed that the intro to "Always Have, Always Will" is almost identical to the intro to "I Can't Help Myself" by the Four Tops? Well, it is. Listen to them both and you'll see what I mean. Talking of "I Can't Help Myself" (sugar-pies, honey-bunches), I still remember the dance to that ... and the dance to "Band of Gold" ... and the dance to "Get it On" ... hell, I'm old. I need another visit from Christine to make me feel better. Then again, having seen her latest photos, maybe I don't.

Celine Dion is Haunting My Computer!

My computer is acting very strangely, very strangely indeed. I know there is probably a simple technical explanation for what I am about to tell you, but not being technically-minded I have no idea what it might be. Needless to say, if anyone reading this does have an idea, please tell me.

Last night, before I went to bed, I played a few games of back­gammon on said computer. At that point, there were no other programs running. After I'd finished, I clicked the start button, then the shutdown button. At the same time as I pressed the latter, the most amazing thing happened. CELINE DION SANG TO ME.

I kid you not, Celine Dion really did start singing to me. She was singing "Titanic" and the actual words she sang were "Once more, you opened the door, and you ...", at which point she was cut off in her prime because the computer closed down. I sat there open-mouthed, I had absolutely no idea what was going on. I do have that song on my hard-drive, but I haven't played it in a while and I'd had none of my music players running yesterday. How could Celine just start singing to me like that?

This morning I switched on the computer and as my desktop appeared, so did Celine. This time she sang "Near, far, wherever you are" at me. She stopped there, at the point where all the icons appeared and the desktop was fully loaded. I decided to try rebooting to see what happened and this time she started singing when I hit the restart button - the same words exactly as she sang to me last night when I shut down.

WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?! As I said, I'm sure there's a rational explanation for this (although I wouldn't be saying that now if I didn't have that song on my hard drive, I'd be calling Psychics Anonymous). And even if there is a rational explanation, could those words mean anything? Is someone from afar going to open a door to me? Is this a real door, or a metaphorical door?

You've got to admit, this is mighty peculiar. I'm not averse to a nice song, but Celine really shouldn't start singing at people like that unannounced, it just isn't right. If anyone else has experienced Celine Dion singing to them like this (or any other person), or if you have even the remotest inkling what this is all about, please let me know.